W hen we watch others shed their clothes, what do we reveal about ourselves? The Chippendales are in Britain this month to kick off a city European tour, and the girls at the Spearmint Rhino lap-dancing club are always available. This week, I have been to both to wonder what — if anything — is exposed alongside the flesh? In Edinburgh, the Chippendale audience piles in. It's a Barry Manilow convention attacked by a hen party and digested by Sex and the City. There are old women, young women, pretty women and angry women.

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Women start measuring a man's performance well before his pants come off. Sex starts as soon as the first zipper makes a southern slide and what follows — the process by which two people become two naked people — colors the entire experience that follows. Fortunately, it's mostly intuitive. Method 1: Tell Her to Undress for You Sometimes, women love when their man takes control in the bedroom. And they love when their man focuses on them and only them.